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She unknowingly whispered out a random little giggle, but it was at such an appropriate spot in our quiet conversation that we laughed out loud with her. She’s sleeping most of the day, fairly comfortable in the bed in her hospice room.  Jim, Lindy, my sister Lisa, and I (her sister D) are alternating sitting with her and visiting and laughing with each other as we watch her rest and recall shared memories. She’s still so beautiful and kind. She wakes but just for a few moments at a time. These waking moments seem to take incredible energy on her part and are typically reserved for Lindy or Jim. However, she acknowledges a visitor by opening her eyes and still manages to show extreme kindness and appreciation to the doctor and nurses taking care of her.  

Dr. Reddy informed her this past Monday that there was nothing left to do for her cancer but to keep her comfortable. She answered him with the same courage and dignity that she has displayed at every turn in this journey, “Well, I guess we did all we could.” We moved her to Hospice of Wichita Falls on Monday afternoon. It’s a tranquil setting:  Elegant, peaceful, willing to serve us….. just like Bevo we think.  She’s still fighting valiantly, and we’re still enjoying every moment we have left with her. She and we continue to appreciate your prayers and welcome your brief visits.

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Another rough patch…

It’s been quite  a while since my last post. It’s been a busy, if somewhat difficult, time. Lindy’s had lots of activities – parties, picnics, and GRADUATION! That was a wonderful day. We had family in and had a nice lunch after graduation. Everyone was happy and proud. There weren’t any tears at our house! This was one of those days I wanted to live to see, and I did it. Not on my own, of course, but only with the help of God. I was so thankful for all your prayers because without them, I never would have made it to this special day. Thank you so much.

Since my last post, I’ve been able to get some chemo. I’ve had my belly drained a couple of times. And dialysis continues. I’ve felt pretty good some days and awful on other days. My last blood work looked great, and the most recent CA19-9 has dropped to 8600+. Unfortunately, I’ve developed some jaundice, and due to the fact that I’ve been practically unable to eat anything, I’ve lost ten pounds in the last week. Dr. Reddy is very concerned, as am I. But I think that relieving some of the pressure off my belly will help me regain my appetite. At least I hope so. Dr. Reddy seems to think that I will not last much longer if I continue to decline like this, and of course, he’s right. Nobody can last long if they can’t eat.

I’ve always known, since I was diagnosed a little over three years ago, that things could turn bad and head south pretty quick. I don’t know if that’s what’s happening now, but I feel like we need to plan like it is and hope for better. We’ve had to tell Lindy that it’s best for her not to go to Rome later this month for Frog Camp. We are all so disappointed about it, but it would be difficult for her to get home quickly if she needed to. I hope with all my heart that she can go to Rome someday, but now is not the time. We’ll do our best to make it up to her. She’s disappointed and sad, of course, but she is a strong girl and responded to the news in appropriate fashion – she went shopping! Hopefully, she will still be able to go to Georgia for Young Life camp in July – it’s much easier to get her back home from there if needed.

I’ll try to post more often. Jim says people are always asking about me, and I know it would be helpful as far as updating everyone if I posted more, so I’ll try to. The main thing right now is that I need your prayers. More than ever. I love you all so much, and I pray everyday for the Lord to bless you. Please pray for Jim and Lindy, too, and my family. And each other. Thank you.

And once again…

Back to the hospital. I’m going in early tomorrow morning for a new graft. They will try to place this one in my right arm. The one in my left arm is just constant trouble, so we’ll kind of start over with a new one. It will be a couple of weeks before we can use it, and I hope the one in my left arm will hold out long enough to make the transition. My left arm has been swollen for several weeks now, so it will be nice to get rid of that problem, too.

I’ve been feeling pretty good the last day or so, and my blood counts are good right now. I hope to get a chemo treatment next week if the graft surgery goes well and my platelets don’t get too low. I really feel the need to get chemo soon – I know the cancer is probably gaining on me with every day I have to wait. It seems like one roadblock after another lately, and it’s been very frustrating. Especially on my bad days, when I’m in a lot of pain, it’s easy to get really down, and I have to make an extra effort to keep that from happening. I have to keep fighting and not let it get the better of me. I’m afraid my faith gets weak at times, and I have to remind myself to surrender everything to Jesus and just let it be. Then on days like today – when I feel so good – I’m so thankful and grateful – it’s easy to have faith and trust that everything will be OK. The days are up and down. I just hope for more up days than down days. I still have to take them one day at a time. And for this day, and every day, I am thankful.

His grace is sufficient.

Happy Mother’s Day

To all you wonderful mothers out there, here’s wishing you a happy and blessed mother’s day! May God bless you and your children and give you many days of happiness with them!

I am so proud of my sister, Dallas, and her husband, Carl! The have just had their Feasts of Faith book published! This is a book they have been working on for some time, and it comes from their many years of experience in developing and teaching this material. It’s a study of the various feasts God established for the Jewish people and how those feasts foreshadowed the coming Messiah. It’s absolutely fascinating!

Here, go see for yourself – this is the website they have (still a little under construction), but you can order soon from Amazon and other places.

Feasts of Faith: Finding Jesus in the Jewish Feast 

Dallas and Carl have done a great job on this book! I pray that it will turn many hearts to God and bring Him glory and praise. I hope you will take a look at it, and that it will bring you new understanding and renewed love for our Lord.

And Again…

I made another brief stay in the hospital this week. I went in Friday morning to get platelets, but stayed overnight for observation. It was one of those “as long as you’re here” things where I was able to get the fluid on my abdomen drained Saturday morning. What a relief! I had been feeling like I was 9+ months pregnant. The radiologist drained off three liters this time. I hope I will be able to get a catheter soon, then I can just “open the tap” and drain it at home. Anyway, I’m hoping to get a new graft for dialysis access maybe this week, if my platelets increase enough. Then I can get chemo again as soon as possible. In the meantime, I’m feeling really good right now, probably courtesy of the steriods I got while in the hospital, and look forward to getting over this latest rough patch.

Thank you as always for your continued prayers.

Home Again

I came home from the hospital yesterday afternoon. It was a pretty rough patch for a few days there, but I’m feeling much better now. I’ve just been resting for the most part, but I wanted to let you know that I did finally get out of there.

As always, the people who took care of me while I was in the hospital were absolutely wonderful. So many of them are familiar to me from previous visits. We are so blessed to have these folks work in our local hospital. I always feel safe and comfortable there. Thanks to all of them for taking such good care of me.